Thursday, September 29, 2005

Still waiting my turn

The Forbes magazine 400 Richest Americans list is out and once again I didn't make the cut. Damn! The last guy on the list (and I had to wade 16 pages into the report to find him) was worth about 900 million dollars. This means I would have to rob at least a hundred Brinks trucks to put me in contention. That's starting to sound too much like work. I'm thinking about having a serious accident on Bill Gates front lawn while delivering a pizza. Never mind that he didn't order pizza. These mistakes happen, you know?

(Interesting aside: 4 out of the top 5 on the Forbes list are college drop-outs. That's where I went wrong!)

12 comments:

Anonymous said...

The fact that 80% of the top 5 are college dropouts shows that there's no link between educated intelligence and "success" as measured by our capitalist society. However, I'd rather spend a lifetime with someone who's read great books, written clever prose, or contributed to our understanding of the universe than with someone who's figured out how to force 500 million Chinese to work for less than a dollar a day, and to convince 200 million Americans that cheap products, cheap labor, and low taxes will be our eternal salvation. Or, even worse, that violence, gore, and degrading sex makes for great entertainment that can be sold via video games, computers, and films for millions of dollars, yen, and euros. Sorry, but I'm not impressed by these lists. I'll take poor, with two college degrees, any day...

Jack said...

To quote the great scholar Emil Faber, founder of Faber College in Faber, PA: "Knowledge is Good." (Animal House)

Anonymous said...

Did you find that quote in Barlett's?

Unknown said...

Thank god i dropped out! there's still a chance for me (after the sex change)

Mike said...

4 years of college wasted! Damn.

Anonymous said...

Crap! I'm 48 (well, almost Jack ;) and still going to school. I should be making money, driving a Hummer (or at least getting one...) and generally behaving in a selfish, wasteful manner. Tomorrow I think I'll flip someone off for helping an older person cross the road and then I'll invent something useless that I can sell for lots of money!!!

Mike said...

Good idea Jon, except for the hummer part, I still hate them.

Jack said...

Jon, you're just looking for an excuse to slack off. Get back to work. Somebody's going to have to manage our microbrewery!

Mike said...

I'll do it!!!

Anonymous said...

MMMMmmmmmmm...beer

Birdie said...

I think people are just people. Some are money oriented and chose a path that exploits others. Some chose different goals. Well I never made to college in the first place, so I've gotta take a bit of exception to some of the stuff posted here. I try to read as much as I can, and I hope to someday attend school when my kids are grown. I just didn't have the opportunity when I was young, and no family encouragement, and I've been a mom for 20 years. Does that make me less worthy? Maybe it does. Hell if I know. I feel stupid most days anyway. Blah.

Jack said...

The school of life is all that really matters. Somehow I managed to get in, but I've been on academic probation ever since ;-)